My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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