Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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