Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Randomize
