Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
