I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
