and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize