that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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