btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
