I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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