no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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