Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize