is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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