Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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