I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
