Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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