Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
