they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
