lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I hate all girls vehemently.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
