Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
