I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
