giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
