we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
