If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
These tits shall not be calmed
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
