Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
Is it because I queefed?
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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