my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
