TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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