Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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