we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Randomize
