I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Randomize