areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize