I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
