the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I am naked and annoyed.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
