its not stalking. its research.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
