better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
