Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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