Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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