i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
