Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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