Will you blow on my dice?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Dear god my vagina.
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