I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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