Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
