I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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