I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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