So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
