I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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