I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
