I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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