just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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