He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
