How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
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