Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
