whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I intend to get homeless drunk
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize